Annoying Facebook Posts

I've mentioned that I'm not considered to be "cool", right?  I ain't popular, I don't got a bucket-load of friends, and I just ain't cool.  So, therefore, I only have a Facebook account by means of social media.  And Facebook, I am finding, is getting to be downright annoying.  And I'm not talking about the website, I'm just talking about posts. 

Normally, I like people just fine.  I see them and will silently judge them maybe a little, but not too much.  However, when it comes to the cursed Facebook, I lack restraint filter-wise.  If you want me to not be vocally annoyed with you then you'd better read this.  Do. NOT. Do the following  P.S.  I'm guilty of doing some of this, so note that I'm also annoyed with myself at these:

"Boys need to constantly romance girls."  It's so annoying when I get on Facebook, and I see something about how "all girls want is a text at three in the morning that is ten lengthy paragraphs singing of their beauty.  Is that too much to ask?".  That may be a slight exaggeration, but you get the point.  Girls have such unrealistic expectations of how they need to be treated in relationships!  Look, I agree, romance is nice.  It's wonderful.  And I don't think I'm being bitter.  But when you want huge, amazing, glorified surprises 24/7, it comes across as a little high maintenance.  I'm sure that there are guys out there who will do that.  But they're probably creeps who want a little something more than just your sweet personality.  Or they will run out of steam very, very quickly, and maybe that's why you want such things?  Because that's what you used to get?  I don't think it's right for a man to live for their girlfriend, though.  I guess that's what I'm trying to say. 

"Share if you were a girl who grew up playing in the dirt, running around, and not being afraid to be one of the guys!"  My thoughts on this?  Stop trying so hard.  Just stop.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a girl who doesn't enjoy getting dirty and having to shower afterword.  And there's nothing wrong with being a tomboy!  But the context of those sorts of posts have the slight tone of saying that something is wrong with girly-girls.  Can't we just live in peace?  Must you be so aggressive about your childhood and how much better it was than every one else's?  It's annoying.  Stop. 

"Kids today have no respect for.... When I was a kid..."  Okay, ninety-nine percent of the people posting this stuff are my age!  Why are you posting about what's wrong with kids when you are one yourself?  And they're usually complaining about how we spend all of our time on the computer or phones.  Then why aren't you running around instead of doing exactly what you're yapping about? And, if you are an adult, it's still really annoying.  We get it.  We're different.  It's still not very pleasant to see. 

"Share if you recognize this from the nineties!"  No.  Just no.  I don't  know why this bugs me, but it does.  I don't care.  Just stop. 

Anything political.  This is delicate.  But you are being about as biased as I am being right now, except you are doing it all the time.  And isn't there somewhere else you can be involved in controversial topics?  Do you have to do it here?  Cut it out.  Most of your friends don't care.  I don't care.  And if I do, then I most likely disagree with you, but there are other places to wage war.  Not on Facebook.  Misguided as it is, I go on there to have a break from the world.  I'm begging you not to ruin that. 

"I'm a victim."  Stop pretending!  You've made mistakes!  And most of the time, believe it or not, many people are going through the exact same thing you are.  You haven't sacrificed anything!  I'm sure you're a good person, but if you need to complain about how you're a good person who is left all the time, then look around.  We all have problems.  And, chances are, you have caused a lot of the drama and pushed people away.  Stop playing... martyr... I guess. 

 

And finally:  Share this and see what people inbox you.  You do realize that nobody actually does that stuff, right?  If a person has a crush on you, they will most likely not say it out loud if they haven't already.  At least, not on the internet.  And if you're trying to get a boyfriend or girlfriend's attention, then sharing a thing on Facebook won't help you. 

 

Okay, sorry, that was really, really honest and angry and possibly a little hypocritical.  I don't have any excuses other than it was just what I wanted to do.

 

Bye!

I'm a Writing Snob

In many circumstances, I am not a competitive person.  Sports, nerdy stuff (fandoms included), and even music.  However, when it comes to a hopeful future career, I'm deadly serious about wanting to be better than everyone else.  Writing is to me what choir class is to most girls. 

So, warning:  If you are not a close friend or already published, and say that you want to write, I will probably like you less.  Just because I want to be special and unique and have absolutely no problems in life, it is nothing personal.  If anything, it just has to do with an insecurity issue.  But let's not dwell on that, because I don't want to become an annoying facebook person.  (I might blog about that.  Facebook has a special way of pushing my buttons).

Anyways, if you say that, then in my head I'm rehearsing coming up to you, asking to read what you've got, and scoping out the competition.  If you are good, then in my head I am sabotaging you.  In real life, I will encourage and try to pinpoint what you're doing better than me.  I'd much prefer to burn whatever you have, but I need to maintain the image of a nice, quiet, shy girl who minds her own business.  But please, if you want me to like you, then don't tell me your intentions for the future in writing.  Become close friends with me.  Then we can talk.  I really would hate for you to get published before me.  I would be thinking about all those times that I could have made you feel horrible about your abilities, and talked you into becoming an accountant.  The arts, including authorism, is a thing wherein you are in the illusion of feeling original, but really are not.  And that's kind of horrible, but I'm being honest, because this is a blog, and I can do whatever I want. 

Now, WATTPAD, on the other hand, I do not dislike you people.  Wattpad is a community, and I feel safe among all of you.  (And, ahem, some of the writing, SOME, is really just atrocious.  Don't be offended, Wattpaders.  I myself have been prone to some pretty bad stuff).  But, really.  This way, I do not have to see your faces when you say that you are planning on becoming an author, and that helps.  I think there's this thing that happens in my brain where I sort of just really don't like those who are confident in what they're going to do.  Like, "Dang it! I 'm a good writer and I'm going to have a best-selling novel and inspire a movie to top it off!"  No way.  I don't like that.  You can't be better than me.  You're not allowed.  No one is allowed.  Go away and find another way to be rich and famous.  But, hey, in writing?  If you say that, we're probably good.  Because then you are not real and therefore not a real threat. 

Unless if you're more of a snob than me.  I don't like that either.  (Does this make me a snob snob?)

But okay, if you DO want to show me something you've written for some reason, don't worry.  I won't be mean about it.  I will graciously accept what you've offered me and tell you that it's great.  Even if it's not, which will be the insult to your personality.  (I'm also shy enough that I wouldn't)  :)  Nothing else.  I'm sure that you're wonderful. 

And if I DO say what's wrong with your work, congratulations, I like you.  You have achieved a rare thing. 

Haha, jk, I like everyone. 

Maybe. 

Bye!

That Awkward Moment When You Have to Write Something You're totally Inexperienced In

I don't date.  With the exception of a skeleton and this one brief stupor in judgment in the first grade, I have never had a boyfriend.  It is a standard of Mormonisnm that I keep, and therefore it has been a really great blessing in my life. 

But when I have to write a part where two of my characters kiss, I struggle a little.  I've never kissed someone!  How on earth am I supposed to talk about something that I know absolutely nothing about?  Yeah, normally, I could use imagination without a problem, but it's not like I fantasize about what it's like to do... that.  With other stuff, like dates, I can! But it just feels dirty when it comes to the meeting of lips.  And, so, what must I do? 

Well, either look it up, or ask my mom.  I'm not too happy about either choice. 

I did actually look it up, but most of the articles were meant for the men, and they were very adamant on being polite and giving signs of warning.  Yeah... this is supposed to be a complete surprise for my character.  She's, like, interrupted by the dude who grabs her face and kisses her.  Heck, I was surprised.  I hadn't been planning on him doing that until way later!  And I hadn't pictured it to be shocking, I had expected her to slowly approach him, and very hesitantly put her arms around his neck, and then kiss him.  But Oliver had different plans, apparently.  It was just one of those moments where you really don't have any control over what the people you create do. 

So, I ended up instead researching how to write a kiss, but that didn't help either.  It got into Frenching and gross stuff like that.  And it didn't tell me if it was lips on lips, or lip over top lip, with the other on the bottom, or... I don't know! 

Of course, now would be the time that I would ask my dear mother, but how do you approach that?  Like, "Hey, Mom, I don't know what it's like to be grabbed in a moment of passion and kissed.  Can you explain?"  Can you say awkward?!  I have enough weird conversations with her; I don't want to add to the list.

And, yes.  Right now, I am avoiding writing out that part and getting into details by doing this instead.  Normally, I'm calm when I do these, but this time it's a no.  I'm.  Freaking.  Out. 

Another thing, I have to read this to my nine year old sisters. We've made a thing out of it, and I need to keep it extremely PG-rated.  I don't want to write anything dirty, anyways, but I also need to put in detail.  Where is the line?  I don't know where it is!  And this isn't really the thing that your English teacher would teach you. 

Okay, I'm feeling a little better after writing this and ranting.  It clears the air with myself.  I'm just going to ask my mom. 

Bye!

Christmaaaaaaas!!!!

I thought that I would share my Christmas day with everyone; meaning that I want to show you my presents. 

Heeeere you go!

I got a selfie stick and this AWESOME sweater.  Thought I would try and kill two birds with one stone.  How'd I do?

I wouldn't be so generous as to say that I'm a fan of Once Upon a Time, but this is Hook, and Hook is hot.  I call it the "bae blanket". 

Even in this glorious time of year, it's important to remember and respect the things lost.  I will be wearing this t-shirt on a frequent basis. 

Aaaaand possibly my favorite.  Lovely, isn't it?

My Life's Story (at Least With Boys)

Because this is a blog, and I respect the idea of them, I will be brutally honest when I say the following statement about the novel I am currently writing:  I don't like it. 

I know that you're supposed to "sell" yourself and your work in this world if you have any hopes of making it, but I am thankfully still a teenager and this can probably be forgiven.  If not, I at least am satisfied knowing that my soul is cleansed from the truth of what you just read.  Because, no, I do not like my book. 

It's not like I ever planned on publishing it or anything, this has always just been a means of practice and getting an idea out there.  I've never wanted to make money off of a simple chick-lit.  They're fun to read, and I am forever grateful to the people who have published them, but I want to make a different statement about what I do.  Straight up romance is just one component of the many, many things that I think can make a really great story.  The Co-Star's Epilogue (the title of said novel in progress), is not the kind of work I want to officially put out there.  Which is good.  It wouldn't get published, anyways.  And that is not to be self-deprecating; it's just the truth. 

I've been writing the thing for a year already, and am only on page 99, so I think that that has always been a sign that it isn't exactly destiny.  And in a year, a lot can change.  Especially my writing style.  I'm not sure if it's improved or not, but it has most certainly changed.  As a result, whenever I look back on the first few chapters or so, I want to cry, and not in a good way.  It's very discouraging to look at a character that I started writing, and to realize that it had a transformation too quickly and too suddenly, hence the word transformation, and not development.  I look at it and wonder how in heck I am going to go back and edit it.  Is that how all authors feel?  I don't know, this is the farthest I've ever gotten on a book.  Once I actually finish it, I will officially be able to say that I wrote a novel, even if I prove to be unsuccessful in future years, but for now I can't even say that. 

But I think I've made it clear that I don't feel warm fuzzies towards it.  The plot is unoriginal, the characters are typical, and it's not too well written.  Honestly, I'm not saying any of this to get the whole "oh but it's so wonderful, Lizzy!" thing, it's just fact.  And that's okay.  I'll go back and edit, and this is just a practice novel, anyways.  I am very much okay with it not being great right now.

The thing that should be asked is why I'm still writing it.  The short answer?  I want to actually finish something so that I can have bragging rights and the experience.

The extended answer?  This book is personal.

Okay, so brief  explanation on the plot of the Co-Star's Epilogue.  It's about a girl named Melody who was dumped after a supposedly totally stereotypical romance, and she was the girlfriend of the guy who had been the main love interest, and ended up being on the losing end.  So she recognized that the love story between this one girl and her now ex-boyfriend was very by the book, so she called herself the co-star, because she thought she was unimportant as a human being, and didn't have her own story. 

As a result of not having a boyfriend, poor Melody was depressed for six months straight before things started actually happening for her.  She met a guy named Oliver, who was quiet and nice and sweet and basically perfect and helped her realize that happiness was still a thing, being dumped isn't the end of the world. 

Now the book has turned into a cheesy romance.  It's great. 

But before I discovered Wattpad, and found that this isn't exactly the most uncommon thing, I had thought that I was completely alone in pretty much writing a fan fiction about yourself.  Yes, that's right.  This book is based off of me. 

Okay, look.  I'm going to say, for the record, I wasn't ditched by a guy.  I never had a guy.  I just liked a guy, and he didn't like me.  Being the self absorbed person that I was and still am, I thought that this was the saddest and most unique thing ever, and was totally devastated.  But, to be fair, I did have a crush on him from grades three through eight, which can be considered to be a long time.  It might have sort of turned into a slight obsession.  Grades four through five I was convinced that I was in love.  Oh, many times I tried to get over it, I just couldn't, which is also kind of normal.  Because I was a terrible mix of drama queen and stupidity, I told all my friends, and they told him, which was really embarrassing, but not altogether surprising.  At the time, however, it was, and therefore I was an unhappy fourth and fifth grader. 

Anyways, I matured, (this is debatable to some), and grades 6 through now, I was and have been a perfect little angel about it.  (Again, debatable.)  It still made me sad, though.  I really liked this guy!  But he also happened to be, like, really popular, whereas I never have been.  It still managed to make me kind of sad.  And then, low and behold, there came along another guy.  Completely indifferent, handsome, and what I thought to be perfect, I was completely into a new guy by the seventh grade.  In my head, it was a little bit like a love triangle, except, you know, neither knew I existed.  I liked this boy for about two years, a little less.  But long enough for him to become the inspiration for my Oliver. 

By the eighth grade, I had already contemplated the fact that we all played roles in each other's stories, and being the pretend martyr that I was, I cast myself as victim in this book of mine.  The longer term crush was David, the guy who did the leaving, and the other was, as said before, Oliver. 

Um, okay, so pretty uneventful after that. I've been continuing to grow as a person, I think, because that's what people do, and I've graciously accepted and gotten over the fact that both boys are not my destined future husbands. 

At some point, through a friend, I found Wattpad, which has been lovely in taking down my deluded sense of being alone a few notches, and have been posting ever since.  I've got fifteen followers, and a little more than 500 reads, and that's really all I need. 

My characters have branched off and become their own people, so I no longer need a person to model them after, and despite everything you just read, I'm really looking forward to working on it. 

I think that's all.  Thanks for reading! 

Oh, and, P.S.:  Disclaimer:  If you're a Wattpad person, and reading this, please know that I do not think of myself as perfect or super nice, as I have portrayed Melody.  Thanks.  ;)

What It's Like Being a Teenager that Wants to Write

If you're into reading articles about writing, which I am, then you've probably noticed that pretty much all of them are written by adults who have actually made money and are sane and have gone on tour or something.

...Yeah, that's not me.  Even though I kind of wish that it was. 

So, I'm here today to tell you what it's like being a teen who writes pretty much every day, and has big dreams, but actually hasn't published anything.  There's actually a lot of stuff that I think that happens in a life like that that doesn't go on in other's. 

You may ask:  Like what, Lizzy?  Thanks, I'm glad you asked. 

Okay, well, for one thing, to me you are not real people.  You are all a part of various story lines, and are characters in said stories. That couple making out in the hallway?  Yeah, so I don't dislike them as much, I pretend that they're a part of some trashy romance novel like Divergent, where they have just made up from a huge fight because one of them was being stupid and the other was being over sensitive.  Apparently they get in a fight every day.  And if you are one of the lucky few that I have a crush on, (I only like one person at a time, but this is just in theory), then you and I are in a non-trashy romance, where we will end up married and living in a humble little home with, like, two children. 

I also have this theory that some of the people in high school are actually agents for a shady governmental group, and are secretly European.  If you happen to be one of those people, please tell me.  I LOVE the accents. 

But in all seriousness, I can't help but look at a person and wonder what part of their story they're at in.  Are they in a backstory right now? The beginning? The climax?  Or are you already on the second book in a series?  I don't know, but I have to try. 

This leads me to my second point, which is that everything is a metaphor.   Does this need much explaining?  Like I said, we're not real people.  We are all a representation of dreams and the illusion of self importance.  Glass is a metaphor of how fragile life is, etc...

My next point, I'm not sure whether or not if it's good.  I'm pretty sure that this is common, but when I zone out, I'm not actually zoning out.  I am thinking of what I'm going to write next.  I'm currently working on a chick-lit, and figuring out the plot for a superhero book that I shall also soon be writing.  School is boring enough that it becomes background music for my thoughts about whether or not I want to break the arm of my character.  Who needs to know about mitochondria, anyways? 

But if you want to become a highly distracted person, then I would recommend writing a novel.  It works.  Maybe a little too well. 

Okay, and one last thing, and I could seriously rant about this all day, I am constantly thinking and being told that this does not make a good living. 

Look, I am constantly living in a state of doubt about this particular subject.  Can I stress enough that I KNOW THIS ISN'T A CAREER WHERE YOU MAKE MUCH MONEY?  Goodness, I know, and I think that anyone who has even considered becoming an author knows this.  They probably even know that getting published is pretty darn hard.  But we do not write so that we can become rich, we write because, shocker,we like it.  If you have a choice between sitting at a computer for hours at a time and not making much money or going to a mental asylum, I will gladly choose the computer, thank you very much.  I NEED to write.  I'll work another job, if I need to, but I'm not going to just give up on something that I love so much.  It's like telling your friend who is addicted to drugs that the drugs aren't good for them.  Do you think they'll listen?  (Okay, maybe not your friend, but you get the point).

And that's another thing, yes, I need to write every day.  If I don't write for an extended period of time, especially during the middle of the writing of a book, then bad things happen.  I forget writing strategies, I forget my character's tone, and it just doesn't look good.  As a person who is completely serious about becoming published in later years, it's important to have constant practice. Writing is just like any other skill, you can always improve, but you have to practice. 

So, in conclusion, please, please, PLEASE refrain from telling me that this is hardly something that brings in money.  I know.  I tell myself this every day and wonder if I'm just wasting my time doing this.  But I really, really do not care. 

And remember:  to me, you're not real.

How does it feel?

Hello! It's Meeeee....

So I'm a blogger now.  Great.  I'm excited. 

Do I know what to say?  No.  Do I hate beginnings because they carry a large amount of significance and weight to them that still worth far less than the amount of stress?  Oh, yeah. 

But I want to do this.

Why?  Because despite the stuff that you just read, I really, really, want to be a writer, and I am finding that putting my own philosophies into a story that isn't a philosophy book doesn't really work.  But I get all grouchy if I can't talk about myself enough, and it's not like people are eager to listen to you rant all day about what's wrong with the world.  (And what's right.  There's that, too).

So now I blog, where talking about yourself is encouraged, and you can do whatever the heck you want.  

And because I'm nervous and I really hate introductions, even though they're necessary, I'll just give you a list so that we can become properly acquainted without saying much else. 

I now give you:  All you need to know about Lizzy Cozzens, the Mormon Teenager (cue trumpet sounds):

Fact 1.  I'm not going to really say any names of my family members or anything, as I will be posting a link to here on a website called Wattpad, and you never know if your few followers are psychopaths.  (No offense, Wattpad followers.  You know I love you).

Fact 2.  I am fifteen.

Fact 3.  Yes, I have a boyfriend.  His name is George, and he is a plastic skeleton. 

Fact 4.  My favorite food is some Greek spinach/lemon/dough thing that no one can actually spell. 

Fact 5.  My favorite color is white.  If you want to debate the validity of that statement, then just know that I am right anyways. 

Fact 6.  I'm not athletic.  At all.

Fact 7.  I LOVE the Lunar Chronicles.  If you've read them, please tell me, because chances are we will become best friends. 

Fact 8.  Whovian here. 

Fact 9.  I play oboe. 

Fact 10.  YouTube is bae.  Have you heard of Rhett and Link?  Because if you have, then chances are that we will once again be best friends.

Fact 11.  I LOVE italics. 

Fact 12.  I love commas. 

Fact 13.  I have three little sisters, and one older one.

Fact 14.  Two of the little sisters are twins.  They're nine. 

Fact 15.  Organization is a thing in which I am lacking. 

Fact 16.  I am a grandma stuck inside a 15 year old body.  a.k.a., I don't understand technology very well. 

Fact 17.  For my future husband that is not a plastic skeleton:  I want to elope, as long as it's to a temple.  And, yes.  I'm completely serious about this.

Fact 18.  Blankets are the best things ever. 

Fact 19.  I enjoy the consumption of chocolate. 

Fact 20.  We're done with facts about me. 

Okay, well, hopefully you enjoyed that.  I'll most likely just post rants and stuff about high school in the future, but I felt like I needed to give you something by means of getting to know me.  And... I also am kind of bad at conclusions, so I'll just bid you a good day, and tell you how awesome you are!  Bye!