I'm a Writing Snob

In many circumstances, I am not a competitive person.  Sports, nerdy stuff (fandoms included), and even music.  However, when it comes to a hopeful future career, I'm deadly serious about wanting to be better than everyone else.  Writing is to me what choir class is to most girls. 

So, warning:  If you are not a close friend or already published, and say that you want to write, I will probably like you less.  Just because I want to be special and unique and have absolutely no problems in life, it is nothing personal.  If anything, it just has to do with an insecurity issue.  But let's not dwell on that, because I don't want to become an annoying facebook person.  (I might blog about that.  Facebook has a special way of pushing my buttons).

Anyways, if you say that, then in my head I'm rehearsing coming up to you, asking to read what you've got, and scoping out the competition.  If you are good, then in my head I am sabotaging you.  In real life, I will encourage and try to pinpoint what you're doing better than me.  I'd much prefer to burn whatever you have, but I need to maintain the image of a nice, quiet, shy girl who minds her own business.  But please, if you want me to like you, then don't tell me your intentions for the future in writing.  Become close friends with me.  Then we can talk.  I really would hate for you to get published before me.  I would be thinking about all those times that I could have made you feel horrible about your abilities, and talked you into becoming an accountant.  The arts, including authorism, is a thing wherein you are in the illusion of feeling original, but really are not.  And that's kind of horrible, but I'm being honest, because this is a blog, and I can do whatever I want. 

Now, WATTPAD, on the other hand, I do not dislike you people.  Wattpad is a community, and I feel safe among all of you.  (And, ahem, some of the writing, SOME, is really just atrocious.  Don't be offended, Wattpaders.  I myself have been prone to some pretty bad stuff).  But, really.  This way, I do not have to see your faces when you say that you are planning on becoming an author, and that helps.  I think there's this thing that happens in my brain where I sort of just really don't like those who are confident in what they're going to do.  Like, "Dang it! I 'm a good writer and I'm going to have a best-selling novel and inspire a movie to top it off!"  No way.  I don't like that.  You can't be better than me.  You're not allowed.  No one is allowed.  Go away and find another way to be rich and famous.  But, hey, in writing?  If you say that, we're probably good.  Because then you are not real and therefore not a real threat. 

Unless if you're more of a snob than me.  I don't like that either.  (Does this make me a snob snob?)

But okay, if you DO want to show me something you've written for some reason, don't worry.  I won't be mean about it.  I will graciously accept what you've offered me and tell you that it's great.  Even if it's not, which will be the insult to your personality.  (I'm also shy enough that I wouldn't)  :)  Nothing else.  I'm sure that you're wonderful. 

And if I DO say what's wrong with your work, congratulations, I like you.  You have achieved a rare thing. 

Haha, jk, I like everyone. 

Maybe. 

Bye!